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tiny attic room

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tiny attic room

Post  Lucie on Mon Apr 23 2012, 03:36

Creeked. The wooden floorboards,
Though bare.. warm underfoot .
Polished by the steps he made,
His soles as black as soot.

Cold. The peeled chipped walls were
Flakes of paint and dust
Fell on rotting skirtingboards
That hid petruding nails of rust.

A small, deep inset window
With checkered frame of lead
Whose dirty pains of glass allowed
Fingers of light, be bled.

And casting eerie shaddows
His animated thoughts projected
Then, once at calm, his strong right arm
Paints the images reflected.

Within the room, amidst the gloom
Aside this tortured creature,
The easel. Having influence
As the only predominant feature.

The canvas is his window
To a realm misunderstood.
THIS world he cannot live in
But live through his art. He could.

(C) Lucie




Last edited by Lucie on Fri Jun 08 2012, 11:40; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : to finish)
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  jinettyx on Mon Apr 23 2012, 14:46

Oooh....a tad creepy...is there more??
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  Lucie on Tue Apr 24 2012, 06:56

yeah but i lost heart....not meant to sound creepy, sombre, dull dreary..you see, thats why i give up
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  jinettyx on Wed Apr 25 2012, 14:21

You must never give up.....you are writing these things for a reason.
You need to be heard no matter how your words come out, that's why you ARE a poetess!!! Believe in yourself.....I believe in you xxxxx BIG hug
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  Lucie on Wed Apr 25 2012, 15:37

realised quite few spelling mistakes too....TUT TUT
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  BC Williams on Wed Apr 25 2012, 18:42

I love what you have so far Lucie. You mum is right: you're a poetess, and poetesses dream like this every now and again. Help us out . . . let us see what you see in that room with wooden floorboards that creak. You've begun an interesting sketch, now give us the painting.

scribe

PS: I believe in you too . . ..

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Be obscure clearly. ~ E.B. White
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  Sue McDonald on Sun Apr 29 2012, 06:46

No No No Lucie, don't give up, this is not creepy or dreary .......Very intriguing and deep. The first couple of lines painted the picture in my mind, I could feel and see the warmed wooden floorboards that creaked, the black footprints, the rusty nails, more more more ....please I'm intrigued !!!! Well done .....so far !!!! Like a Star @ heaven Like a Star @ heaven Like a Star @ heaven clapping clapping clapping scribe give flowers
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  Lucie on Fri Jun 08 2012, 11:48

well it kinda has an ending..
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  mikeschultz on Fri Jun 08 2012, 19:16

Good work! Emotive and descriptive. I enjoyed the reading of your poem very much. Like

Mike
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  Lucie on Sat Jun 09 2012, 11:13

Thank you very much guys,
:D
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Re: tiny attic room

Post  jinettyx on Sat Jun 09 2012, 13:13

Again I think you have a magnificent imagination!.. I am so glad that you continued with this wonderful image of the attic room! I clapping you sweetheart. Please don't ever stop! None of your poems are in the least dreary, as you can see, we all love your work! xxxxx They have wonderful poignant meanings.
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